Hide and Seek

When I was a little girl, my brothers and sisters and I would often gather outside in the court where we lived for a game of hide and seek. I wasn't much of a hider; however, I loved when I got the chance to be the seeker. After I had counted to what always seemed like 5,000, I would boldly proclaim, "Ready or not, here I come!" And then I would take off with much enthusiasm to find those who were hiding.

Lately, I've been feeling as if I've been playing a game of hide and seek with the Lord. But this time, I'm not being much of a seeker; I am doing more of the hiding. I can here Him calling my name, saying, "Come out, come out, wherever you are!", but for whatever reason I haven't allowed myself to fully come out of my hiding place just yet. I am not intentionally hiding from Him. But these days I am finding myself constantly on the move, not slowing down long enough to allow the Lord to catch me.

I started the New Year off with some really good goals -- daily Bible reading and prayer, moving towards health and wholeness. But I am realizing that as I've been busy striving to reach all of my goals, I've lost site of what's most important -- sitting at the feet of Jesus and allowing Him to speak to my heart. I even find that sometimes my daily Bible reading is mechanical and there is no revelation. The truth is, I am realizing I am much more of a Martha than I want to be. I am so caught up in the "doing" that I am not spending enough time just "being". I long for a heart like Mary's.

The Lord says, "Ready or not, here I come!"

My response is, "I am ready Lord. Come and find me!"

So here I am Lord, I am ready to be found. I will meet you half way and seek after You. I come before you now, empty handed, with no agenda, no tasks to complete, no questions to ask. I just want you.

Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near. (Is. 55:6)